I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
