Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
