you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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