I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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