It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
