So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
