Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
