i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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