Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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