did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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