He is such a slut. More and more my type.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
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