I want to have your abortion
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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