I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize