i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Randomize
