i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
