Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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