sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
