we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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