their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize