it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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