We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
