i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
