I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
