My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
