i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
