My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
