so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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