Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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