sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
