dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize