I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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