what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
It's no shave November. This is our time.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Randomize
