Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize