Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
