I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I touched a dick in church today
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
