You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize