In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
