Sry I called you an 8
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
