she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
