Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
