You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize