I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Your penis caused this!
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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