p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
