he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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