So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
