ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
