My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Just cropdusted the office
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
