hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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