HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize