Having a random hookup so left but love u
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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