dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
